baldy

i never thought i would say this..... but i am going bald at the ripe old age of 22. hair is everywhere. it even follows me like i can save it. hair in the bed, hair on a chair, hair on the floor, and don't forget the shower drain.... (sorry dad!)

i'm not sad to be rid of my hair..... i will be saving so much money on hair supplies;-)

but if it doesn't all fallout by tomorrow, i am shaving it. being proactive?

i know i will have mixed feelings about being bald, and i'm sure i'll cry here and there. but when i am going through a chemo treatment and i don't have to deal with my hair..... i will be smiling.

in fact i will probably feel sorry for everyone who has hair, they have to do it , wash it, dry it, style it.... and i just get to sit back and enjoy my baldness. and then a wonderful shampoo commercial will come on and i will probably sob like a baby.

which comes to crying..... man it has been happening a lot... for no reason. (well besides the whole cancer thing.) nolan posted some of my drugs earlier, which i take around the clock (gag me.) i mean really, i don't feel like waking up at 5am to take another pill. but they all have to be spread out, and ruin my life :-) but im sure they aren't helping me stay emotionally stable.

i have a nice gallon size baggie full of rx's that i take with me everywhere. because who knows when that nice alarm on my phone is going to tell me to take the next one. i probably look like a freak walking down the street (which i don't actually do) carrying a zip-lock bag full of pills. i'm sure i look like a creeper.

the first week after chemo was the hardest. physically and emotionally... i'm not sure why.... but it may be due to the fact that i still have poison in my system. i'm going to ask the doc about this before out next round..... which falls sometime around valentines day (ahhhhh)

but as of right now i am feeling good. and hopefully it stays this way. because i don't like blogging about my bad days (which is why there weren't any for awhile)